On Being Meek

I read once that a white male in this society at the age of 55 is at the very peak of his career and wage earning years. I was probably sitting at home sending out resumes or trying to kick start my business when I read this. Most folks don’t remember what the headlines read before 9-11-2001. I do. It was ‘Nasdaq Tanks as Tech Stocks Plummet”. In one two year period ending somewhere in 2004, almost one third of all high tech jobs in this country disappeared. I had been going through the usual ups and downs if IT work – periods of unemployment brought on by layoffs, downsizings, company buyouts, company failures – and decided to take my first love, music, and see what I can do with it. I am grateful in large part for the opportunity to pursue my passion, but I am paying for it. I make about as much money as a good poet. But, after sending out 1,000 resumes in two years, it was a change that I really didn’t have much choice but to accept.

I am a meek person. I am a man. For a man to say that he is meek is like saying that he is weak. In fact, the words even rhyme. The Bible tells us that the meek shall inherit the world. I’m struggling with this. I pretty much see companies, empires, countries - you know, the high end components of our culture - run by very much non-meek people. I suppose the Bible is telling us that money’s not everything; earthly pursuits are vain, etc. but it doesn’t say that us meek people will get our reward in heaven. It says that we’re going to inherit the earth. It reminds me of a bumper sticker I once saw that read “The Meek Will Inherit the Earth. The Strong and the Wise Will Move on to New Worlds” (Long bumper sticker.) Well, I’m ready for my inheritance. Or perhaps I could just get a small advance on my inheritance. Cash would be nice, but securities, something fairly liquid would help me make it to next month.

I like meek people. My very favorite people are pretty meek. Most non-meek people I know are rather, ummm, let’s say assertive? That’s about the best word I can come up with in polite company. When I am in their presence I can feel the life force sucked out of me, flowing into their veins with an almost perceptible flush of power and control. I can be made to feel just about like a 13 year old kid in the presence of a captain of industry. And, you know, I really don’t mind. If sharing this planet with non-meek people means letting them be large-and-in-charge in personal interactions, that’s fine. I can avoid that. What I can’t avoid is this notion that I’m supposed to be inheriting something. I’d like to see something tangible fairly soon. Not getting any younger. Devalued stocks, CDs, anything. Maybe we can start small. Like the keys to some small midwestern town. Nothing big. They wouldn’t even notice me. I’m meek. I’d ask their permission to take possession, probably.

So, an acoustic musician cum web developer is what I am, meek or not. I’m not really expecting to inherit anything except some old books from my mom some day. And, all things considered, I choose meek, inheritance or not. When I’m not starving to death or worried about getting the utilities turned off, I sleep well at night.

Later.